Sometimes, I Love My Life


I'm Celeste, known as Dangerous in some circles. I go to engineering school. I like to build things, ride my horse, make music and play with fire. Sometimes, good and beautiful things happen and I like to remember them.
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[image from the Time Love Memory project]
“Why I Burn” by San Jaya Prime
Peep: “How was the burn?” Me: “I eat dust for breakfast!” Peep: “Uh.. . details please?” Me: “My plate was so crusted with dust on Sunday morning that I just put the pancakes on it, sprinkled a little more dust on top and went to town. In summary: I eat dust for breakfast.” Peep (with somewhat disgusted face): “This is the place you said was awesome?” Me: “You wouldn’t believe how good playa dust tastes on pancakes.”
I was careful not to title this “Why We Burn”, because I’d be a big liarface to make THAT claim. Asking why we ALL burn would end with well over a hundred-thousand answers. My own answer is simply: “Because I burn.” That’s not enough for most peeps. When asked after my first burn back in ‘05, I ended up spewing a stream-of-consciousness series of stories, images and random quotes that changed with every person who asked. And that’s about what this journal entry is.
If you’re already a burner (and just want your fix), here’s a link to the absolute “must read” article: “You people have ruined me. Thank you.” My favorite quote from the article comes via Wolfe: You can go home again, but you can’t go all the way home, and not all of you makes it there.
If you’re not a burner, but want to know what it’s about, I’ve gotta prop Audi on the damned good job she’s done of touching on many important aspects of the burn on her blog (I also want to note that she spreads the culture well beyond the desert): Burning Man, Part I: What Is It? /// Burning Man: The Art /// Burning Man: The Fashion
If you’d just like the funniest story I have to share from this year (and that won’t be appearing here), then check out my entry on Landlore: How to Properly Issue a Ticket to a Police Officer in 5 Easy Steps If you are otherwise a glutton for punishment and are actually sticking around, then let’s get this party going! Begin random thoughts, musings and the externalization of insanity!
Dawn: The two had danced all night. One hair short of broken, they decided to head back to camp. The best of plans last about 5-seconds on the playa (aka, “PlayaADHD”). Their plans lasted only a few seconds longer than the average… just long enough to cross a group of about twenty burners all dressed in white and walking arm-in-arm. The two looked at each other. “We’re wearing white. They’re wearing white. Wanna go with ‘em?”
Joining arms with the group, they walked out into the desert… leaving the city behind as they approached the Temple of Flux. The group sat in a circle within the Temple, sitting just within sight of the rising sun thru the cracks. One of the white-clad burners stood in their center, pulling a small box out and opening it. He went around the circle, placing powder from the box into each open hand before returning to the center. Meeting one eye after another, he said: “You’re holding the ashes of my brother. Press these ashes to your heart.”
Some were breaking down already… even as they took the ashes to heart. Hands tightened as he spoke again: “Forgive yourself.” The circle broke into uninhibited mourning and gratitude, some holding others for strength. He repeated… his own voice cracking and softening… “Forgive yourself.”
This is no singular event at Burning Man. This happens every minute. Yet every raw experience like this remains unique and cuts right to the fucking core. After being beat to shit in some dust storm and wondering if you have enough water to make it back to camp alive, the world itself will break open and a true authentic connection is made. Again. And again. Tim Ferris shared one in his entry “Kindness in a Storm” [I highly, highly suggest reading the comments as well]. Even if you skip the entry, go read the poem in the entry RIGHT NOW… I will wait.
Milagro: My dumb ass thought Burning Man was some type of concert out in the desert. Wow! Just wow! Let me tell you how the hard facts of a five-mile city filled entirely with living, breathing art hit that little wordview with one hellova sledgehammer. If Burning Man was just some concert in the desert, it wouldn’t be worth it. I wouldn’t be back year after year for some desert audio festival. The media doesn’t get it either. Because they don’t get it, they latch on to things they DO get: sex, drugs & rock n roll. That’s the shit that sells anyway, so it works out pretty good… well, other than the fact that the media does nothing to actually inform the world outside the desert of what goes on out there. I mean… what do you tell people? It sounds ludicrous any way you say it. Well, for one week out of each year, this city appears out in a desert and more than 50,000 people from around the world migrate to the city… and there’s dragons… n pirate ships… n… what? No… I’m being serious.Actually, this is kinda toned down… even though it already sounds like some fairytale.
I love the playa… my first morning after waking up on the playa in 2010, I woke to find four hot women in dresses just across the street from me. They were pounding rebar stakes into the playa in order to build a shade structure. Women + Power Tools = WIN!
Home: Home this year was at 6:15 & Hanoi. The 5-mile city is built in a circle (just like a clock). The center is empty other than art and vehicles that look like they’re from other planets. The inner street is called Esplanade. It’s always Esplanade. Radiating out from the center are streets A, B, C and so on… with the hours of the clock forming the spokes of the Wheel of Time. Each year gives the alpha-streets new names. Burners explain the layout so often that most peeps who know anything at all about the place already “get” this. If you don’t get it yet, try skydiving in to the city by piggybacking on this video (bonus = good music [free song download here]):

In my virgin year, Home was at 9:15 & Delirium… just up the block from the best day club at the time — The Deep End.
Getting Home: It’s not just me… getting to the playa is hell! There were broken down vehicles… an RV deal gone wrong… tickets changed up and just about every road bump possible along the way. It’s NEVER easy. Part of it is by design. It’s at the beginning of the school year, at third-quarter’s end for business and the ticket will cost a peep three Franklins if they don’t plan ahead. I worry so much going into it… but every goddamned time I hit the dust I remember how futile all the worrying was. It is worth the pain. I remember that worrying was silly and that the work was worth it. You pack your money away and forget about it… ‘cuz you’re on the playa… everything’s not just free, but being actively given to you.
Getting home this year was a group effort, as I caught a ride with Ch!p (who’d picked me up hitchhiking outta the burn in ‘09). He and his lovely Pauline had flown outta San Fran to Reno after some real crazy change of plans. I spent a day in DT Reno watching thousands of people in a huge tomato-throwing fight meant to gather attention for the American Cancer Society, then partied to the music downtown. Of all places, it turned out Circus Circus was the cheapest… and it was alotta fun outside of the terrible staff at the desk. I met up with Ch!p and Pauline at Reno airport the next day, then met the rest of our motley crew: Daniel, Vicki and Shiny. Daniel and Vicki were still harried from having gone to the Emmy’s the night before and making the mad airport rush in the morning. Shiny was already in Burning Man gear and wearing clothes mostly to keep the police at bay. After I managed to take us another city past our exit (yes, even after 6-years), we finally broke from the highway and onto the flat, dusty plain of the Black Rock Desert… with Black Rock City on the horizon… and then it started to rain.
Now, if a line was halted at Disney Land while it was raining, there’d be grumbling so loud that they’d hear it in Los Angeles. Not at Burning Man. When they halted the line, everyone got out and started partying. People turned up the volume on their radios, some broke out major sound systems and burners were out meeting each other and going from car to car… often with treats and other fun pouring outta vehicles. When the rain broke, the sun caught the air itself and two rainbows formed perfect arcs over the flat desert… a third rainbow trying to form just outside of ‘em. I hadn’t seen a double-rainbow on the playa since 2007. It was already warming up to be a great burn.
I’m actually going back ‘n forth at the moment with @burncaston Twitter. Lots of music, quotes and other art flying around while I write this. It may be a little distracting, but it helps feed the spirit. Where was I?
A live MC at Club Nexus was rapping over the DJ’s music, yelling lines like “Live life, love life!” and “Get the government outta here. This is our city — Black Rock City!”
Dancing Feet: This is the first year that I’ve gone into the burn with actual dancing plans… schedule included: when, where, who. I even took my iPod with so that I’d have a clock. Having the time on the playa was WEIRD! I’ve become amazingly adapted to living by a light/dark/in-between schedule in the desert and time just didn’t make much sense. Nonetheless, an added side benefit was having access to scribble down notes on my iPod as well… so I actually kept information and random records… and managed to make more than 50% of the shows I’d set out to make. More on the music later.
I damned myself to type all this. If I’d not taken notes, it coulda just all been lost to the dust… but nooooo. Now it’s too late. I couldn’t live knowing I hadn’t gotten it online… not now… it’d stay on my brain’s task manager eating up resources until I got it out.
RV Camp: Our little super-rogue camp consisted of two RVs with a tarp tied across the top of ‘em and down the front, with my tent snuggled up underneath the end of the tarp. It was big pimping… and only my second year going rogue. Morpheus and Maya pulled in early, early on Tuesday morning to bring the second RV, while Daniel, Vicki, Ch!p and Pauline held down the other one. We’d already dropped Shiny off at Costume Cult when we first hit the playa. We had a seriously chill but pimpin’ camp, within walking distance of our friend Eben at Entheon, near Camp Mystic and just a little down the ways from Ingrid and Lovecat (who I’d sadly missed for two years). It wasn’t where we’d planned on landing, but the city had filled up quick in 2010. In fact, they’d built two extra rings to extend camping areas.
Cauldron: 2007 and 2008 saw some ‘o the worst storms on the playa. One whiteout in 2008 was well over 12-hours and I was a crew chief that year. We finally surrendered and started working while it stormed. The storms are why my tent has a permanent layer of dust in it… about an inch by now. That tent never fails to collapse, but it hasn’t broken after four burns. It’s a keeper. In 2010, we had three days of beautiful weather (Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday). Why sleep? They were contrasted by nights on the weekend that were downright freezing and a dust storm that blew in Friday and lasted up until the man burned. When it finally dusted, a mutant vehicle I was on blasted over the bullhorn: “It’s so good to see everything covered in dust! Finally, things are looking normal around here.” I was laughing so hard at the thought of “normal” that I was crying.
On our final night… after the Temple burned… it got so cold that I walked up to Center Camp and built a fire. A wizard (hat and all) showed up who knew where more wood was. He, myself and another burner I called Pigeon carried a huge pile of wood to the bonfire and built up quite a blaze. A violinist near the fire played for the stars above… and, one-by-one, other burners gathered around the blaze for warmth.
Me: “What are you doing tonight?”
Jess: “I dunno. The yoozh.” (think “usual”, but slanged) “Ask me again tomorrow.”
Sunset Cocktail Hour: Despite Friday’s storms, I found myself atop an RV at sunset with many lovely faces that I’m proud to call my tribe. I didn’t even know the Fefff had made it, so I got a nice surprise on top ‘o the sangria. The Miz and I were talking and almost didn’t notice the mushroom cloud explosion on the horizon. Our garbled shout told Jonathan, Jess, Ellechip, Yas and the rest that something was happening… something bigger than everything else that was happening everywhere all around us. We’re not talking some small explosion. We’re literally talking a mushroom cloud of propane just fifteen minutes after sunset. We still don’t know what it was that blew up. A few hours later, they would blow up a wooden city out in deep playa, but who knows where the nuke came from? It was damned impressive though.
With a Boom: Time to jump into the music for a bitty minute. If you understand that this desert is almost perfectly flat, and that the surface is hard-packed clay with a layer of fine dust on top of it, then any audio acoustic engineer already knows that the place is made for bass. It reverberates up thru the surface of the desert and into your body. The music is everywhere. But it was BassCamp who was insane enough to bring a frakking Funktion-One sound system to the desert for The Temple of Boom this year. I heard Mochipet, R/D, Laura, Samples, Sugarpill and more on that system… and damn… I’m sold. BassCamp is my new favorite “noise camp” at Burning Man. Noise camps (for y’all non-burners) are the greatest clubs on the entire planet. With all the fire (flame-throwers, fire-dancers), lasers and moving bodies… it actually reminds a peep of the second Matrix movie where they celebrated in Zion… and with many of the same connotations.
Dubstep, btw, is in full-on invasion on the playa. BassNectar held down the limelight for years, then it quickly spread to the mutant vehicles, but in 2010 there was more dubstep than other forms of electronica. I usually spend the entire week at Opulent Temple (another noise camp), but this year I was between BassCamp and Root Society Underground the entire week. While dancing to Mochipet at BassCamp, I ran into someone from Glitch.fm and told her about the “2999” project that Mochipet, Kraddy, myself and many others are on. I still need to email her about that… as everyone forgets so much leaving the playa.
Kraddy absolutely killed Roots Society Underground. He had the crowd so worked up that they cut the volume so that they could pull people down off the dome. Best show I’ve seen on the playa since Tiesto. It’s hard to tell whether R/D or Mochipet took second for the year. R/D put together an incredible progressive-dubstep set that whip-cracked the energy thru the roof! But Mochipet had a more hyper energy and mixed in tracks from other people as well… and it felt like Mochi was more in-tune with the audience. In the end, it goes to Mochipet. That’s almost entirely based on the fact that R/D didn’t mix his “I’m Not Done” (Fever Ray) remix and I definitely felt let down on that point, whereas I wasn’t let down once by Mochi. So… third place this year goes to R/D, who’s quickly working his way up the ranks of dubstep. Can’t wait to see him again.
Dubstep remixes were everywhere. I was trying to be a good boy and get to sleep before sunrise one night, but had to pass Entheon Village on my way. I heard someone say over a mic: “Yeah, I’m An-Ten-Nae, and I have a few more before saying g’night.” I like some of An-Ten-Nae’s stuff… not enough to stop.. . but then he started spinning this remix of “Zombie” that was INSANE! This, btw, was just hours after hearing Mochipet spin Dual’s dubstep remix of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” [link]. Damn!
MiMOSA gets fail-points for canceling multiple shows, but plans going crazy are nothing new on the playa. Crystal Method was Crystal Method… n’ drew the largest crowd I’ve ever seen on the playa. I actually left halfway thru the show to head over to BassCamp. It’s not like bigbeat isn’t good. It’s great in fact. I’m just a big loser boy when it comes to how much I love dubstep, tech-hop and acid crunk.
Someone near our camp was playing “Drink the Sea” by The Glitch Mob on repeat all day Tuesday. LOVE whoever the hell thatwas. I completely tuned out from everything but the music… just laying sprawled in the shade and soaking up my favorite album of the year. Love. YOU!
The funny part? The best video that sums up the parties at Burning Man uses a song I’ve only heard once on the playa… but damn is it a good vid!

You don’t just go to Burning Man; you survive it. When that Man raises his arms at the end of the week in victory, you frakking scream with everyone else. That victory belongs to us all. The entire playa burns with him as the flames take him, an uninhibited spirit of celebration overtaking 50,000 people all gathered together around this singular icon. Yes. Burn him!
One of the most beautiful ways I’ve seen the Burning of the Man described was written by Anna: “We are dancing. We are releasing. He is on fire. He is burning. And we are losing our minds.” She perfectly captures the energy of the Burning of the Man here in this entry: Burning Man 2010: Metropolis
The Temple: Usually, the Temple is 60% of why I burn. Not this year. This year it was the people and the music. That’s a good thing, as the Temple was a bit of a let down. Burners are split between who loves the night and who loves the day. I’m a nighttime burner, although I party the hell outta the day as well. It was when I went to the Temple by-day that I “got it” this year. The dust storm parted before me as I walked to the Temple and I saw its wooden architecture rising like a frozen dune out of the desert. It was beautiful. I had a letter to deliver to the Temple from my sister Gaea who couldn’t make it… and an Autobot symbol for Bumble Bee (Danielle)… who also couldn’t make it. I’m glad I “got it” on the day when I needed to deliver these important symbols to this holy place.
The ashes of my blood-father are in that Temple… in the dust itself. My sister and I took his ashes to the Temple of Forgiveness in 2007… the year he was going to join us for the burn. While that wasn’t what we had in mind, it’s how it went down. I visit him year after year.. . and join others in the pure, raw outpouring of emotion and energy that surrounds the Temple. What people write, draw and paint on the walls will tear almost anyone apart. I live to be torn apart by the Temple.
It wasn’t just the Temple that let me down, however. The temple crew did as well. I heard one of them talking about how people had climbed on the Temple, stating: “It tears me apart just thinking about it.” I felt sorry for her, but even more sorry that she would project her own expectations on other burners. Of course people would climb on it. I find divinity in climbing myself.. . in the challenge. . in the accomplishment.. . in the height. The limited worldview was painful to me. To take an act of spiritual expression and transform it into disrespect brought pain to the playa… and brought pain to the Temple.
This was followed by my own encounter. After waiting for sunrise one morning for almost two hours, I was asked to leave because I was smoking. It was a different woman. She said it was a fire hazard, a rather insulting excuse as I grew up making and overseeing pyrotechnics. I know that a cigarette is not a fire hazard. It was also sad that I had been asked to take tobacco smoke away from the Temple, as tobacco is one of the last legal forms of ritual and spirit left in society and a deep part of my own spirituality. It is a testament to how amazing the rest of my burn was that these things didn’t critically damage it, although I do look forward to other temple crews taking over the reigns again. In the end, I’ve found that who builds the Temple has little to do with it’s true beauty. It’s what burners bring to the Temple, write on its walls and bleed across its every surface. It’s the ash it’s built on. That beauty can never be tarnished.
A burner this year put together a video that vividly captures the serene beauty and spirituality of the playa. I’ve been sharing it everywhere I can.

From my journal, written on the playa: Each piece of clothing packed is a memory of a night out, or a day in the dust, or a kiss. A tent coated in dust with scattered energy drinks is the symbol of a week that can never be replaced… nor replicated. In a matter of hours they will bring fire to the Temple… and they’ll light the most beautiful building on the planet. I’m already missing Home, even though we haven’t left it. I’m already missing my tribe. All that’s left in this broken body is gratitude and love. Thank you. I love you.
Faces: So many faces that have been absent for years made a return. The Jedi-killer was back along with Drew… Joy was back… and a whole new group of virgins. At the same time, I couldn’t help but feel who was missing. Amongst others, I definitely missed Prisoner 24601, Sharif, Bad Naughty Llama, Disco Lama, Gaea and D2. The better the burn, the more you miss burners who couldn’t be there. Everything on the playa is bittersweet, as it’s a place of balance. It’s a place that is held on high by the two pillars of Individuality and Community. But the pendulum between forces swings much more wide in the desert than in the default world.
I see his eyes grow wide, then he grabs me and pulls us both down just as a tent flies over our heads. I look behind me, then back at the tent that is still tumbling like some tumbleweed over other tents and just shrug. “Hmm… tent.”
The Pepsi Challenge: I didn’t realize until we were packing up that I didn’t do any hallucinogens at the burn this year. It’s always amazing to remember the things that have been left out and to know that it gets EVEN BETTER! Jeez. All I did was Vitamin E, energy drinks and adderall the entire week. Another realization was that I’d never in my life just had someone give me random drugs. The realization came when someone was asking another friend what they wanted to do that night (in terms of drugs), and my friend replied: “I dunno, surprise me.” How have I never taken the Pepsi Challenge of drugs before? What a great idea. I already know that I can handle a lot and maintain responsibility and cohesion no matter the drug or dosage, so I definitely need to line myself up with a Pepsi Challenge next year. It’ll happen.
The Symbol: We were packed in so tightly for the Burning of the Temple that I was practically sitting on the Canadians behind me (I heard an “, eh?” and they laughed when I spotted it). They were taking photos and I laughed along with them at the results. The flash of the camera, when combined with the layer of dust on everyone, created photos of stark white creatures that were altogether not human. One looked just like a negative imprint of a raccoon in her photo. I took a shot of them as a group and got the first laugh off of that one. In return, one of the girls gave me a symbol. Parting her green robes, she pulled a coin — a disc, almost wooden in texture — from a small bag. Looking at it, she smiled, then handed it to me. “What does it mean”, I asked. “What does it mean to you”, she asked in return. I smiled. That was the right answer. As the ashes of the Temple fell, the two of us hugged with the release of uninhibited energy from the week. As with many faces on the playa, I don’t even know her name… but the symbol now rests on my altar. A gift of the magi.
A Parting Gift: For the first time in six years, I intentionally packed a care package to give to the Department of Public Works on our way out of the playa. Energy drinks, batteries, cigarettes and more all went into a re-usable cloth bag… along with a note. I’d given them things before, but I wanted to give them my love and gratitude as well. They show up weeks before the burn, build this amazing city, then stay for weeks afterward and clean up what things could’nt be carried outta the desert. I have a lot of friends in the rangers (a type of internal police force) and in DPW. I can’t thank them enough.
Tears in Rain: Burners have an intimate relationship with the forces of Creation and Destruction. We’ve seen the most beautiful places, faces and moments — we’ve become them — then watched them taken away. I once saw two young women and a man perform a ritual of fire that will stay with me as long as I still have this body. It was beautiful, tragic and highly emotional and only about five other people saw it. I don’t know who they are. I likely never will… and no one else I know experienced it.
The quote that strikes me shortly after leaving every burn comes from Blade Runner: I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time… like tears in rain… time to die.
I mixed it into this tribute to the Schema (RIP 2007):  And it’s not just me. I found it a few days later in the comments for the video I posted earlier that covered the spirituality of the playa. Here’s the link to the video and the comments. Then, just earlier (while tweeting back and forth with BURNcast), they shot the same quote right at me. I had to share “Sacrifice of Form” with them… just one of the rather magical coincidences in that conversation. So, does a dead replicant that once taught me the lesson of non-rightness capture the spirit of the playa? Maybe… I wouldn’t be surprised to still be learning from Roy Batty more than two decades later.
The Rites of Passage: The theme for next year’s burn is “Rites of Passage”. Most of my rituals involve blood. I have some research ahead of me to find out what first aid is needed on the playa when it comes to cuts and piercing, but I’m already going crazy over the theme. There is more information on it already up on the main site here. It’s my favorite theme yet!
All Is Forgiven: There comes a point every year at the burn where I feel — fucking feel in my core — the statement: “All is forgiven.” Obama’s bringing the country down almost as quickly as Bush was… wars are still on the increase (with two more brewing), and the only difference seems to be who the blind ones are that are cheering and who the ones are that speak out against it… but it’s all the same. I can’t live with it most the time… but at the burn it’s taken away from me. I feel it. Too much love for the world to hate it. We’ve chosen this drama… this game of houses. So if it ends… it ends. We had a good run. So fucking thank you for all who put the game in place and let us have our drama in all its tragic beauty… even if but for these few short years this species has lived. All is forgiven. The Man burns in 329 days.
Worlds burn. Stars crumble. And life is born of the void. Burn bright… and stay lit!

more
As usual, the above entry contains terrible ommisions, extraneous errors and is otherwise comparable to a steaming pile of dust-coated drivel. But I’ll be damned if it ain’t entertaining. It goes on. I’d made quick one or two word notes on my iPod and have to cover them… as well as links to much better non-drivel entries and resources online. iPod Notes: Emuin dot Com: Ingrid and Lovecat introduced me to a fellow DJ and producer called CC Love (aka, Emuin). After talking well over an hour about music, I was sure to get his URL to give him a listen! Logic 8 in Ableton: One of the suggestions for generating and sculpting bass, including sub-bass levels. I’ll definitely be checking it out when it comes time to flesh out the production on my 2012 EP. Sea Buckthorn: Nilectric has truly discovered playa gold! She brought this oil to the playa these last two years that immediately cuts thru the dust and restores moisture and softness to the skin. It is nothing short of incredible. It is the Sea Buckthorn Body Oil from Welda. Amazing! Knife & Fishnets: Showing a non-burner your inventory for going to Burning Man is a hilarious experience that I suggest each burner inflict upon at least one innocent muggle. This is just one example. I didn’t bring my knife in 2010 and it came up at least once a day… sometimes more than once. Also, my fishnets have torn beyond repair. I need new fishnets. And never… ever… leave the knife at home again. The Chordless Lamp: While having breakfast tacos cooked up by the glorious Hollywood herself, the two of us stumbled on a fun illusion. We couldn’t get the chord for the lamp to reach the generator, so there was no light to cook by. It was an average living room lamp, with a wide base, a thin neck taller than many humans and with an almost martini glass styled top. It likely has a name. I just don’t know it. What we did was put a battery operated light onto the top of the lamp that we couldn’t light. The result was what appeared to be a lit up lamp with a chord that was unplugged. It triggered the idea of making an entire section of a camp based on simple illusions just like this. What a great idea! Bubbies Old World Saurkraut: I shit you not, I had the best damned saurkraut of my life at the burn this year. My sister Maya brought four jars of this stuff to the desert and I was like, “Saurkraut? WTF? Seriously… you brought saurkraut?” I then tasted it and got owned on. I have big plans to infect the entire Austin scene with this stuff. Orthorexic: Morpheus, while talking about people who believe their own diet should be made into law governing others (Health Nazis), coined the term “orthorexic”. It comes from the merging of “orthodox” with the suffix denoting an eating obsession. I noted it down… only to later find out that it means much along the same lines. Orthorexia nervosa on Wikipedia. Black Rock Beacon: Did I mention that there are newspapers on the playa? There’s a post office, radio stations, camps with mail boxes… it’s a city. It’s just a city made entirely of art. My favorite article this year was in the Black Rock Beacon on Tuesday. They have it online in PDF form here. Any other burners who love the Beacon and can donate, they’re gathering funding right now to make it to BRC in 2011. Check It! iPod Solar Charger: I told Ch!p that I’d email him the link for the solar chargers I’d seen other travelers using for their iPods. They are seriously pimp and amazingly small for long-term travelers such as myself. While looking into them again, however, I came across a new company that looks promising as well. Here is the link. Playa Passports: For the last three years, I’ve brought a playa passport with me. It’s really just a black Moleskine Cahier Pocket Plain Notebook. You get a lot of stickers on the playa, including the annual sticker representing the burn itself. These make your stamps. There’s also a pocket in the back to keep your ticket. I’ve kept my ticket for every burn. They’re each in my passport. My new ticket goes in there the second it comes in the mail, as I always know I’ll have my playa passport with me. For the ones I give out, I also want to make a wooden block cutting that I can use to press into the cover the words “Playa Passport” with “Black Rock City, Nevada” below it and in smaller font. It has to be artistic of course. So many people have loved the idea that I want to make a gift out of it. I’ve researched it and I can get 324 for just under $700 dollars. That’s a lot of dough. BUT, there are other moleskin FANATICS out there who attend the burn that may be able to help with funding. I want to give two out to each person as a gift: one for themselves and another to gift away. I noted it down because this HAS to happen. That One Article: Dammit! I still can’t find it. Somewhere out there, a peep wrote an article about what to do when you’re not going to Burning Man but want to re-live the experience. It’s hilarious, going over things like having your lover dance naked in front of a fan while you throw sawdust in front of it before making love… as well as turning off the air conditioning and blasting your music. I know it’s out there. If you post it, they will come. Cracks (Flux Pavilion Remix): I was obsessing over this song I heard at BassCamp for days. I didn’t know the name of the song or who made it, but… sure enough… a burner at the airport was able to spot it for me. Even after getting it, I’m still obsessing. SICK! Here it is:

…end iPod notes. Time to throw in some links that are just too good to hold back… BURNcast: I know, I know… I already mentioned ‘em, but it’s worth repeating. Tips on how to handle the cops, great stories on and off the playa and all-around lovely people. While they’re powering down on new info for a while, now’s the time to subscribe and link up with ‘em on Twitter to prep for next year’s burn. Burning Man dot Com: If you’re not a burner yet, the main site is where to start. Other than the most beautiful gallery you’ll ever find yourself lost in, the information you’ll find on the main site will help make sure you don’t fucking die! Hop to it bitches! Burning Man Timeline by Stick Figures: So true, it’s painful. Art Car Blog: Wanna know what a mutant vehicle is? Already know what an artcar is and didn’t know there was an entire blog dedicated to them? This is THE place to get your artcar fix! Festival A Go Go: I love the raw, direct writings on Festival A Go Go, breaking the Burning Man experience into three amazing articles. - Burning Man 2010 part 1: Acid Dreams - Burning Man 2010 part 2; Sparkle Ponies - Burning Man 2010 part 3: Camps A Fool’s Attempt to Describe Burning Man: Fool they may be, but jumping in head first makes for a fun read. The Burning Man Festival as Modern Desert Pilgrimage: For anyone who gets pretty deep into the spiritual side of Burning Man like I do, this article is for you. The funny part is that I’ve been suggesting it AS a pilgrimage to so many of the travelers I’ve met along the way… and love hearing the very same word ring thru others. Larry Harvey Speaks: If all you know about Burning Man is what you read here and what the media has told you, this article works wonders to expand the fuck outta that view… mostly thru linking to some real mind-opening info. Google is so going to ding my blog for how much I’ve been swearing. Oh, well… ISU students get credit for Burning Man: You read that right. The article is even better. One of the funniest things I heard this year was a tweet from the main Burning Man account, hilarious completely due to its juxtaposition. Normally, you hear students grumbling about how they’re trying to get out of class to go to Burning Man. The tweet was a retweet from a teacher who was trying to figure out how to get out of class and away from their students to go to Burning Man. Awesome! The Enduring Appeal of Burning Man: While it’s from 2009, this four-way radio interview is not only entertaining, but downright informative. I love the host, the guests and even the peeps who called in. I don’t really tune in to radio anymore offline, but transcripts like this make for one happy Tiki. Now… it’s been a month since the burn. Let’s compare all the awesomeness above to what has happened here in the “default world” just in the past month. I’ll cover the negatives first, if only so I can end this on a positive note. A month of yuck in the default world: - Obama’s made torture legal. Joy. [link] - The day the ruling was made, almost a hundred cases that were in court from those who were innocents, yet tortured at GITMO, were dropped. Their voice was stolen. - Boulder was on fire, a California neighborhood literally exploded and even Utah wanted in on the bonfire action. - Fucking Mary Anne Hobbs, the goddamned Voice of Dubstep, has left BBC Radio 1. Not Happy! - Facebook made professional AND personal pages smaller and eliminated boxes to make space for larger ads. - Cops stole a new born baby right out of a hospital and actually listed that one of the reasons was that he was affiliated with the Oath Keepers, a peaceful organization that stands up for the constitution. [link]. - The U.S. is taking measures to begin “wire tapping” everything, including emails and other online and offline activities [link]. - Finally… and I thought I’d never live to see it… the U.S. is burning books [link]… and extremists, not wanting to miss out on the action, went and burned the Quran. A month of rock in the default work: - If the Voice of Dubstep is going to step down, at least the Shadow of Dubstep was there with her—Burial. Many in the industry refer to our time as “The Post-Burial Dubstep Environment”. To have Burial and Kode9 with Mary Anne on the last day was awesome. Also, so many of us in the community were tuned in at the same time. We were tweeting back and forth, sending love and it was easily the most unified moment I remember in this entire life outside of Burning Man. I love Mary Anne Hobbs. Without the Voice, the environment may quickly be divided into VIP—the “pop” of dubstep—and independent. It is up to all of us to carry the torch forward and keep this community non-zero. - The movie “Machete” was as absurd and fun as I thought it’d be. Hell yeah! - Science finally verified yet another theory by Arthur C Clark (“2001”), as they discovered a diamond the size of a star [link]. - Solar cells can now be grown like plants and regenerate damages [link - with thanks to Jill]. - MySpace made the first positive changes that I’ve ever seen. Seriously. Check it!. Google also stepped it up, following their voice calling from the month before with a priority inbox that actually works. - I’ve been a fan of Khameleon808 for five years. I’ve been a fan of The Glitch Mob for three years. To see these forces brought together was personally fulfilling on a deep level. Here below is Khameleon’s finished product—The Apple Tree [skip to 1:20 to jump right into the action]:

…I second that shit: “FUCK YOUR WAR!”
 Foto by Michael Holden

jayaprime-blog:

[image from the Time Love Memory project]

“Why I Burn” by San Jaya Prime

Peep: “How was the burn?” Me: “I eat dust for breakfast!” Peep: “Uh.. . details please?” Me: “My plate was so crusted with dust on Sunday morning that I just put the pancakes on it, sprinkled a little more dust on top and went to town. In summary: I eat dust for breakfast.” Peep (with somewhat disgusted face): “This is the place you said was awesome?” Me: “You wouldn’t believe how good playa dust tastes on pancakes.”

I was careful not to title this “Why We Burn”, because I’d be a big liarface to make THAT claim. Asking why we ALL burn would end with well over a hundred-thousand answers. My own answer is simply: “Because I burn.” That’s not enough for most peeps. When asked after my first burn back in ‘05, I ended up spewing a stream-of-consciousness series of stories, images and random quotes that changed with every person who asked. And that’s about what this journal entry is.

If you’re already a burner (and just want your fix), here’s a link to the absolute “must read” article: “You people have ruined me. Thank you.” My favorite quote from the article comes via Wolfe: You can go home again, but you can’t go all the way home, and not all of you makes it there.

If you’re not a burner, but want to know what it’s about, I’ve gotta prop Audi on the damned good job she’s done of touching on many important aspects of the burn on her blog (I also want to note that she spreads the culture well beyond the desert): Burning Man, Part I: What Is It? /// Burning Man: The Art /// Burning Man: The Fashion

If you’d just like the funniest story I have to share from this year (and that won’t be appearing here), then check out my entry on Landlore: How to Properly Issue a Ticket to a Police Officer in 5 Easy Steps If you are otherwise a glutton for punishment and are actually sticking around, then let’s get this party going! Begin random thoughts, musings and the externalization of insanity!

Dawn: The two had danced all night. One hair short of broken, they decided to head back to camp. The best of plans last about 5-seconds on the playa (aka, “PlayaADHD”). Their plans lasted only a few seconds longer than the average… just long enough to cross a group of about twenty burners all dressed in white and walking arm-in-arm. The two looked at each other. “We’re wearing white. They’re wearing white. Wanna go with ‘em?”

Temple of Flux Interior, Burning Man 2010Joining arms with the group, they walked out into the desert… leaving the city behind as they approached the Temple of Flux. The group sat in a circle within the Temple, sitting just within sight of the rising sun thru the cracks. One of the white-clad burners stood in their center, pulling a small box out and opening it. He went around the circle, placing powder from the box into each open hand before returning to the center. Meeting one eye after another, he said: “You’re holding the ashes of my brother. Press these ashes to your heart.”

Some were breaking down already… even as they took the ashes to heart. Hands tightened as he spoke again: “Forgive yourself.” The circle broke into uninhibited mourning and gratitude, some holding others for strength. He repeated… his own voice cracking and softening… “Forgive yourself.”

This is no singular event at Burning Man. This happens every minute. Yet every raw experience like this remains unique and cuts right to the fucking core. After being beat to shit in some dust storm and wondering if you have enough water to make it back to camp alive, the world itself will break open and a true authentic connection is made. Again. And again. Tim Ferris shared one in his entry “Kindness in a Storm” [I highly, highly suggest reading the comments as well]. Even if you skip the entry, go read the poem in the entry RIGHT NOW… I will wait.

Milagro: My dumb ass thought Burning Man was some type of concert out in the desert. Wow! Just wow! Let me tell you how the hard facts of a five-mile city filled entirely with living, breathing art hit that little wordview with one hellova sledgehammer. If Burning Man was just some concert in the desert, it wouldn’t be worth it. I wouldn’t be back year after year for some desert audio festival. The media doesn’t get it either. Because they don’t get it, they latch on to things they DO get: sex, drugs & rock n roll. That’s the shit that sells anyway, so it works out pretty good… well, other than the fact that the media does nothing to actually inform the world outside the desert of what goes on out there. I mean… what do you tell people? It sounds ludicrous any way you say it. Well, for one week out of each year, this city appears out in a desert and more than 50,000 people from around the world migrate to the city… and there’s dragons… n pirate ships… n… what? No… I’m being serious.Actually, this is kinda toned down… even though it already sounds like some fairytale.

I love the playa… my first morning after waking up on the playa in 2010, I woke to find four hot women in dresses just across the street from me. They were pounding rebar stakes into the playa in order to build a shade structure. Women + Power Tools = WIN!

Home: Home this year was at 6:15 & Hanoi. The 5-mile city is built in a circle (just like a clock). The center is empty other than art and vehicles that look like they’re from other planets. The inner street is called Esplanade. It’s always Esplanade. Radiating out from the center are streets A, B, C and so on… with the hours of the clock forming the spokes of the Wheel of Time. Each year gives the alpha-streets new names. Burners explain the layout so often that most peeps who know anything at all about the place already “get” this. If you don’t get it yet, try skydiving in to the city by piggybacking on this video (bonus = good music [free song download here]):

In my virgin year, Home was at 9:15 & Delirium… just up the block from the best day club at the time — The Deep End.

Getting Home: It’s not just me… getting to the playa is hell! There were broken down vehicles… an RV deal gone wrong… tickets changed up and just about every road bump possible along the way. It’s NEVER easy. Part of it is by design. It’s at the beginning of the school year, at third-quarter’s end for business and the ticket will cost a peep three Franklins if they don’t plan ahead. I worry so much going into it… but every goddamned time I hit the dust I remember how futile all the worrying was. It is worth the pain. I remember that worrying was silly and that the work was worth it. You pack your money away and forget about it… ‘cuz you’re on the playa… everything’s not just free, but being actively given to you.

Getting home this year was a group effort, as I caught a ride with Ch!p (who’d picked me up hitchhiking outta the burn in ‘09). He and his lovely Pauline had flown outta San Fran to Reno after some real crazy change of plans. I spent a day in DT Reno watching thousands of people in a huge tomato-throwing fight meant to gather attention for the American Cancer Society, then partied to the music downtown. Of all places, it turned out Circus Circus was the cheapest… and it was alotta fun outside of the terrible staff at the desk. I met up with Ch!p and Pauline at Reno airport the next day, then met the rest of our motley crew: Daniel, Vicki and Shiny. Daniel and Vicki were still harried from having gone to the Emmy’s the night before and making the mad airport rush in the morning. Shiny was already in Burning Man gear and wearing clothes mostly to keep the police at bay. After I managed to take us another city past our exit (yes, even after 6-years), we finally broke from the highway and onto the flat, dusty plain of the Black Rock Desert… with Black Rock City on the horizon… and then it started to rain.

Now, if a line was halted at Disney Land while it was raining, there’d be grumbling so loud that they’d hear it in Los Angeles. Not at Burning Man. When they halted the line, everyone got out and started partying. People turned up the volume on their radios, some broke out major sound systems and burners were out meeting each other and going from car to car… often with treats and other fun pouring outta vehicles. When the rain broke, the sun caught the air itself and two rainbows formed perfect arcs over the flat desert… a third rainbow trying to form just outside of ‘em. I hadn’t seen a double-rainbow on the playa since 2007. It was already warming up to be a great burn.

I’m actually going back ‘n forth at the moment with @burncaston Twitter. Lots of music, quotes and other art flying around while I write this. It may be a little distracting, but it helps feed the spirit. Where was I?

A live MC at Club Nexus was rapping over the DJ’s music, yelling lines like “Live life, love life!” and “Get the government outta here. This is our city — Black Rock City!”

Dancing Feet: This is the first year that I’ve gone into the burn with actual dancing plans… schedule included: when, where, who. I even took my iPod with so that I’d have a clock. Having the time on the playa was WEIRD! I’ve become amazingly adapted to living by a light/dark/in-between schedule in the desert and time just didn’t make much sense. Nonetheless, an added side benefit was having access to scribble down notes on my iPod as well… so I actually kept information and random records… and managed to make more than 50% of the shows I’d set out to make. More on the music later.

I damned myself to type all this. If I’d not taken notes, it coulda just all been lost to the dust… but nooooo. Now it’s too late. I couldn’t live knowing I hadn’t gotten it online… not now… it’d stay on my brain’s task manager eating up resources until I got it out.

RV Camp: Our little super-rogue camp consisted of two RVs with a tarp tied across the top of ‘em and down the front, with my tent snuggled up underneath the end of the tarp. It was big pimping… and only my second year going rogue. Morpheus and Maya pulled in early, early on Tuesday morning to bring the second RV, while Daniel, Vicki, Ch!p and Pauline held down the other one. We’d already dropped Shiny off at Costume Cult when we first hit the playa. We had a seriously chill but pimpin’ camp, within walking distance of our friend Eben at Entheon, near Camp Mystic and just a little down the ways from Ingrid and Lovecat (who I’d sadly missed for two years). It wasn’t where we’d planned on landing, but the city had filled up quick in 2010. In fact, they’d built two extra rings to extend camping areas.

Cauldron: 2007 and 2008 saw some ‘o the worst storms on the playa. One whiteout in 2008 was well over 12-hours and I was a crew chief that year. We finally surrendered and started working while it stormed. The storms are why my tent has a permanent layer of dust in it… about an inch by now. That tent never fails to collapse, but it hasn’t broken after four burns. It’s a keeper. In 2010, we had three days of beautiful weather (Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday). Why sleep? They were contrasted by nights on the weekend that were downright freezing and a dust storm that blew in Friday and lasted up until the man burned. When it finally dusted, a mutant vehicle I was on blasted over the bullhorn: “It’s so good to see everything covered in dust! Finally, things are looking normal around here.” I was laughing so hard at the thought of “normal” that I was crying.

On our final night… after the Temple burned… it got so cold that I walked up to Center Camp and built a fire. A wizard (hat and all) showed up who knew where more wood was. He, myself and another burner I called Pigeon carried a huge pile of wood to the bonfire and built up quite a blaze. A violinist near the fire played for the stars above… and, one-by-one, other burners gathered around the blaze for warmth.

Me: “What are you doing tonight?”

Jess: “I dunno. The yoozh.” (think “usual”, but slanged) “Ask me again tomorrow.”

Sunset Cocktail Hour: Despite Friday’s storms, I found myself atop an RV at sunset with many lovely faces that I’m proud to call my tribe. I didn’t even know the Fefff had made it, so I got a nice surprise on top ‘o the sangria. The Miz and I were talking and almost didn’t notice the mushroom cloud explosion on the horizon. Our garbled shout told Jonathan, Jess, Ellechip, Yas and the rest that something was happening… something bigger than everything else that was happening everywhere all around us. We’re not talking some small explosion. We’re literally talking a mushroom cloud of propane just fifteen minutes after sunset. We still don’t know what it was that blew up. A few hours later, they would blow up a wooden city out in deep playa, but who knows where the nuke came from? It was damned impressive though.

With a Boom: Time to jump into the music for a bitty minute. If you understand that this desert is almost perfectly flat, and that the surface is hard-packed clay with a layer of fine dust on top of it, then any audio acoustic engineer already knows that the place is made for bass. It reverberates up thru the surface of the desert and into your body. The music is everywhere. But it was BassCamp who was insane enough to bring a frakking Funktion-One sound system to the desert for The Temple of Boom this year. I heard Mochipet, R/D, Laura, Samples, Sugarpill and more on that system… and damn… I’m sold. BassCamp is my new favorite “noise camp” at Burning Man. Noise camps (for y’all non-burners) are the greatest clubs on the entire planet. With all the fire (flame-throwers, fire-dancers), lasers and moving bodies… it actually reminds a peep of the second Matrix movie where they celebrated in Zion… and with many of the same connotations.

Dubstep, btw, is in full-on invasion on the playa. BassNectar held down the limelight for years, then it quickly spread to the mutant vehicles, but in 2010 there was more dubstep than other forms of electronica. I usually spend the entire week at Opulent Temple (another noise camp), but this year I was between BassCamp and Root Society Underground the entire week. While dancing to Mochipet at BassCamp, I ran into someone from Glitch.fm and told her about the “2999” project that Mochipet, Kraddy, myself and many others are on. I still need to email her about that… as everyone forgets so much leaving the playa.

Kraddy absolutely killed Roots Society Underground. He had the crowd so worked up that they cut the volume so that they could pull people down off the dome. Best show I’ve seen on the playa since Tiesto. It’s hard to tell whether R/D or Mochipet took second for the year. R/D put together an incredible progressive-dubstep set that whip-cracked the energy thru the roof! But Mochipet had a more hyper energy and mixed in tracks from other people as well… and it felt like Mochi was more in-tune with the audience. In the end, it goes to Mochipet. That’s almost entirely based on the fact that R/D didn’t mix his “I’m Not Done” (Fever Ray) remix and I definitely felt let down on that point, whereas I wasn’t let down once by Mochi. So… third place this year goes to R/D, who’s quickly working his way up the ranks of dubstep. Can’t wait to see him again.

Dubstep remixes were everywhere. I was trying to be a good boy and get to sleep before sunrise one night, but had to pass Entheon Village on my way. I heard someone say over a mic: “Yeah, I’m An-Ten-Nae, and I have a few more before saying g’night.” I like some of An-Ten-Nae’s stuff… not enough to stop.. . but then he started spinning this remix of “Zombie” that was INSANE! This, btw, was just hours after hearing Mochipet spin Dual’s dubstep remix of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” [link]. Damn!

MiMOSA gets fail-points for canceling multiple shows, but plans going crazy are nothing new on the playa. Crystal Method was Crystal Method… n’ drew the largest crowd I’ve ever seen on the playa. I actually left halfway thru the show to head over to BassCamp. It’s not like bigbeat isn’t good. It’s great in fact. I’m just a big loser boy when it comes to how much I love dubstep, tech-hop and acid crunk.

Someone near our camp was playing “Drink the Sea” by The Glitch Mob on repeat all day Tuesday. LOVE whoever the hell thatwas. I completely tuned out from everything but the music… just laying sprawled in the shade and soaking up my favorite album of the year. Love. YOU!

The funny part? The best video that sums up the parties at Burning Man uses a song I’ve only heard once on the playa… but damn is it a good vid!

You don’t just go to Burning Man; you survive it. When that Man raises his arms at the end of the week in victory, you frakking scream with everyone else. That victory belongs to us all. The entire playa burns with him as the flames take him, an uninhibited spirit of celebration overtaking 50,000 people all gathered together around this singular icon. Yes. Burn him!

One of the most beautiful ways I’ve seen the Burning of the Man described was written by Anna: “We are dancing. We are releasing. He is on fire. He is burning. And we are losing our minds.” She perfectly captures the energy of the Burning of the Man here in this entry: Burning Man 2010: Metropolis

The Temple: Usually, the Temple is 60% of why I burn. Not this year. This year it was the people and the music. That’s a good thing, as the Temple was a bit of a let down. Burners are split between who loves the night and who loves the day. I’m a nighttime burner, although I party the hell outta the day as well. It was when I went to the Temple by-day that I “got it” this year. The dust storm parted before me as I walked to the Temple and I saw its wooden architecture rising like a frozen dune out of the desert. It was beautiful. I had a letter to deliver to the Temple from my sister Gaea who couldn’t make it… and an Autobot symbol for Bumble Bee (Danielle)… who also couldn’t make it. I’m glad I “got it” on the day when I needed to deliver these important symbols to this holy place.

The ashes of my blood-father are in that Temple… in the dust itself. My sister and I took his ashes to the Temple of Forgiveness in 2007… the year he was going to join us for the burn. While that wasn’t what we had in mind, it’s how it went down. I visit him year after year.. . and join others in the pure, raw outpouring of emotion and energy that surrounds the Temple. What people write, draw and paint on the walls will tear almost anyone apart. I live to be torn apart by the Temple.

It wasn’t just the Temple that let me down, however. The temple crew did as well. I heard one of them talking about how people had climbed on the Temple, stating: “It tears me apart just thinking about it.” I felt sorry for her, but even more sorry that she would project her own expectations on other burners. Of course people would climb on it. I find divinity in climbing myself.. . in the challenge. . in the accomplishment.. . in the height. The limited worldview was painful to me. To take an act of spiritual expression and transform it into disrespect brought pain to the playa… and brought pain to the Temple.

This was followed by my own encounter. After waiting for sunrise one morning for almost two hours, I was asked to leave because I was smoking. It was a different woman. She said it was a fire hazard, a rather insulting excuse as I grew up making and overseeing pyrotechnics. I know that a cigarette is not a fire hazard. It was also sad that I had been asked to take tobacco smoke away from the Temple, as tobacco is one of the last legal forms of ritual and spirit left in society and a deep part of my own spirituality. It is a testament to how amazing the rest of my burn was that these things didn’t critically damage it, although I do look forward to other temple crews taking over the reigns again. In the end, I’ve found that who builds the Temple has little to do with it’s true beauty. It’s what burners bring to the Temple, write on its walls and bleed across its every surface. It’s the ash it’s built on. That beauty can never be tarnished.

A burner this year put together a video that vividly captures the serene beauty and spirituality of the playa. I’ve been sharing it everywhere I can.

From my journal, written on the playa: Each piece of clothing packed is a memory of a night out, or a day in the dust, or a kiss. A tent coated in dust with scattered energy drinks is the symbol of a week that can never be replaced… nor replicated. In a matter of hours they will bring fire to the Temple… and they’ll light the most beautiful building on the planet. I’m already missing Home, even though we haven’t left it. I’m already missing my tribe. All that’s left in this broken body is gratitude and love. Thank you. I love you.

Faces: So many faces that have been absent for years made a return. The Jedi-killer was back along with Drew… Joy was back… and a whole new group of virgins. At the same time, I couldn’t help but feel who was missing. Amongst others, I definitely missed Prisoner 24601, Sharif, Bad Naughty Llama, Disco Lama, Gaea and D2. The better the burn, the more you miss burners who couldn’t be there. Everything on the playa is bittersweet, as it’s a place of balance. It’s a place that is held on high by the two pillars of Individuality and Community. But the pendulum between forces swings much more wide in the desert than in the default world.

I see his eyes grow wide, then he grabs me and pulls us both down just as a tent flies over our heads. I look behind me, then back at the tent that is still tumbling like some tumbleweed over other tents and just shrug. “Hmm… tent.”

The Pepsi Challenge: I didn’t realize until we were packing up that I didn’t do any hallucinogens at the burn this year. It’s always amazing to remember the things that have been left out and to know that it gets EVEN BETTER! Jeez. All I did was Vitamin E, energy drinks and adderall the entire week. Another realization was that I’d never in my life just had someone give me random drugs. The realization came when someone was asking another friend what they wanted to do that night (in terms of drugs), and my friend replied: “I dunno, surprise me.” How have I never taken the Pepsi Challenge of drugs before? What a great idea. I already know that I can handle a lot and maintain responsibility and cohesion no matter the drug or dosage, so I definitely need to line myself up with a Pepsi Challenge next year. It’ll happen.

The Symbol: We were packed in so tightly for the Burning of the Temple that I was practically sitting on the Canadians behind me (I heard an “, eh?” and they laughed when I spotted it). They were taking photos and I laughed along with them at the results. The flash of the camera, when combined with the layer of dust on everyone, created photos of stark white creatures that were altogether not human. One looked just like a negative imprint of a raccoon in her photo. I took a shot of them as a group and got the first laugh off of that one. In return, one of the girls gave me a symbol. Parting her green robes, she pulled a coin — a disc, almost wooden in texture — from a small bag. Looking at it, she smiled, then handed it to me. “What does it mean”, I asked. “What does it mean to you”, she asked in return. I smiled. That was the right answer. As the ashes of the Temple fell, the two of us hugged with the release of uninhibited energy from the week. As with many faces on the playa, I don’t even know her name… but the symbol now rests on my altar. A gift of the magi.

A Parting Gift: For the first time in six years, I intentionally packed a care package to give to the Department of Public Works on our way out of the playa. Energy drinks, batteries, cigarettes and more all went into a re-usable cloth bag… along with a note. I’d given them things before, but I wanted to give them my love and gratitude as well. They show up weeks before the burn, build this amazing city, then stay for weeks afterward and clean up what things could’nt be carried outta the desert. I have a lot of friends in the rangers (a type of internal police force) and in DPW. I can’t thank them enough.

Tears in Rain: Burners have an intimate relationship with the forces of Creation and Destruction. We’ve seen the most beautiful places, faces and moments — we’ve become them — then watched them taken away. I once saw two young women and a man perform a ritual of fire that will stay with me as long as I still have this body. It was beautiful, tragic and highly emotional and only about five other people saw it. I don’t know who they are. I likely never will… and no one else I know experienced it.

The quote that strikes me shortly after leaving every burn comes from Blade Runner: I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time… like tears in rain… time to die.

I mixed it into this tribute to the Schema (RIP 2007): And it’s not just me. I found it a few days later in the comments for the video I posted earlier that covered the spirituality of the playa. Here’s the link to the video and the comments. Then, just earlier (while tweeting back and forth with BURNcast), they shot the same quote right at me. I had to share “Sacrifice of Form” with them… just one of the rather magical coincidences in that conversation. So, does a dead replicant that once taught me the lesson of non-rightness capture the spirit of the playa? Maybe… I wouldn’t be surprised to still be learning from Roy Batty more than two decades later.

The Rites of Passage: The theme for next year’s burn is “Rites of Passage”. Most of my rituals involve blood. I have some research ahead of me to find out what first aid is needed on the playa when it comes to cuts and piercing, but I’m already going crazy over the theme. There is more information on it already up on the main site here. It’s my favorite theme yet!

All Is Forgiven: There comes a point every year at the burn where I feel — fucking feel in my core — the statement: “All is forgiven.” Obama’s bringing the country down almost as quickly as Bush was… wars are still on the increase (with two more brewing), and the only difference seems to be who the blind ones are that are cheering and who the ones are that speak out against it… but it’s all the same. I can’t live with it most the time… but at the burn it’s taken away from me. I feel it. Too much love for the world to hate it. We’ve chosen this drama… this game of houses. So if it ends… it ends. We had a good run. So fucking thank you for all who put the game in place and let us have our drama in all its tragic beauty… even if but for these few short years this species has lived. All is forgiven. The Man burns in 329 days.

Worlds burn. Stars crumble. And life is born of the void. Burn bright… and stay lit!



Burning Man 2008 Basura Sagrada by Shrine Tucker and the Basura Sagrada Collaboratory American Dream 08 NV


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As usual, the above entry contains terrible ommisions, extraneous errors and is otherwise comparable to a steaming pile of dust-coated drivel. But I’ll be damned if it ain’t entertaining. It goes on. I’d made quick one or two word notes on my iPod and have to cover them… as well as links to much better non-drivel entries and resources online. iPod Notes: Emuin dot Com: Ingrid and Lovecat introduced me to a fellow DJ and producer called CC Love (aka, Emuin). After talking well over an hour about music, I was sure to get his URL to give him a listen! Logic 8 in Ableton: One of the suggestions for generating and sculpting bass, including sub-bass levels. I’ll definitely be checking it out when it comes time to flesh out the production on my 2012 EP. Sea Buckthorn: Nilectric has truly discovered playa gold! She brought this oil to the playa these last two years that immediately cuts thru the dust and restores moisture and softness to the skin. It is nothing short of incredible. It is the Sea Buckthorn Body Oil from Welda. Amazing! Knife & Fishnets: Showing a non-burner your inventory for going to Burning Man is a hilarious experience that I suggest each burner inflict upon at least one innocent muggle. This is just one example. I didn’t bring my knife in 2010 and it came up at least once a day… sometimes more than once. Also, my fishnets have torn beyond repair. I need new fishnets. And never… ever… leave the knife at home again. The Chordless Lamp: While having breakfast tacos cooked up by the glorious Hollywood herself, the two of us stumbled on a fun illusion. We couldn’t get the chord for the lamp to reach the generator, so there was no light to cook by. It was an average living room lamp, with a wide base, a thin neck taller than many humans and with an almost martini glass styled top. It likely has a name. I just don’t know it. What we did was put a battery operated light onto the top of the lamp that we couldn’t light. The result was what appeared to be a lit up lamp with a chord that was unplugged. It triggered the idea of making an entire section of a camp based on simple illusions just like this. What a great idea! Bubbies Old World Saurkraut: I shit you not, I had the best damned saurkraut of my life at the burn this year. My sister Maya brought four jars of this stuff to the desert and I was like, “Saurkraut? WTF? Seriously… you brought saurkraut?” I then tasted it and got owned on. I have big plans to infect the entire Austin scene with this stuff. Orthorexic: Morpheus, while talking about people who believe their own diet should be made into law governing others (Health Nazis), coined the term “orthorexic”. It comes from the merging of “orthodox” with the suffix denoting an eating obsession. I noted it down… only to later find out that it means much along the same lines. Orthorexia nervosa on Wikipedia. Black Rock Beacon: Did I mention that there are newspapers on the playa? There’s a post office, radio stations, camps with mail boxes… it’s a city. It’s just a city made entirely of art. My favorite article this year was in the Black Rock Beacon on Tuesday. They have it online in PDF form here. Any other burners who love the Beacon and can donate, they’re gathering funding right now to make it to BRC in 2011. Check It! iPod Solar Charger: I told Ch!p that I’d email him the link for the solar chargers I’d seen other travelers using for their iPods. They are seriously pimp and amazingly small for long-term travelers such as myself. While looking into them again, however, I came across a new company that looks promising as well. Here is the link. Playa Passports: For the last three years, I’ve brought a playa passport with me. It’s really just a black Moleskine Cahier Pocket Plain Notebook. You get a lot of stickers on the playa, including the annual sticker representing the burn itself. These make your stamps. There’s also a pocket in the back to keep your ticket. I’ve kept my ticket for every burn. They’re each in my passport. My new ticket goes in there the second it comes in the mail, as I always know I’ll have my playa passport with me. For the ones I give out, I also want to make a wooden block cutting that I can use to press into the cover the words “Playa Passport” with “Black Rock City, Nevada” below it and in smaller font. It has to be artistic of course. So many people have loved the idea that I want to make a gift out of it. I’ve researched it and I can get 324 for just under $700 dollars. That’s a lot of dough. BUT, there are other moleskin FANATICS out there who attend the burn that may be able to help with funding. I want to give two out to each person as a gift: one for themselves and another to gift away. I noted it down because this HAS to happen. That One Article: Dammit! I still can’t find it. Somewhere out there, a peep wrote an article about what to do when you’re not going to Burning Man but want to re-live the experience. It’s hilarious, going over things like having your lover dance naked in front of a fan while you throw sawdust in front of it before making love… as well as turning off the air conditioning and blasting your music. I know it’s out there. If you post it, they will come. Cracks (Flux Pavilion Remix): I was obsessing over this song I heard at BassCamp for days. I didn’t know the name of the song or who made it, but… sure enough… a burner at the airport was able to spot it for me. Even after getting it, I’m still obsessing. SICK! Here it is:

…end iPod notes. Time to throw in some links that are just too good to hold back… BURNcast: I know, I know… I already mentioned ‘em, but it’s worth repeating. Tips on how to handle the cops, great stories on and off the playa and all-around lovely people. While they’re powering down on new info for a while, now’s the time to subscribe and link up with ‘em on Twitter to prep for next year’s burn. Burning Man dot Com: If you’re not a burner yet, the main site is where to start. Other than the most beautiful gallery you’ll ever find yourself lost in, the information you’ll find on the main site will help make sure you don’t fucking die! Hop to it bitches! Burning Man Timeline by Stick Figures: So true, it’s painful. Art Car Blog: Wanna know what a mutant vehicle is? Already know what an artcar is and didn’t know there was an entire blog dedicated to them? This is THE place to get your artcar fix! Festival A Go Go: I love the raw, direct writings on Festival A Go Go, breaking the Burning Man experience into three amazing articles. - Burning Man 2010 part 1: Acid Dreams - Burning Man 2010 part 2; Sparkle Ponies - Burning Man 2010 part 3: Camps A Fool’s Attempt to Describe Burning Man: Fool they may be, but jumping in head first makes for a fun read. The Burning Man Festival as Modern Desert Pilgrimage: For anyone who gets pretty deep into the spiritual side of Burning Man like I do, this article is for you. The funny part is that I’ve been suggesting it AS a pilgrimage to so many of the travelers I’ve met along the way… and love hearing the very same word ring thru others. Larry Harvey Speaks: If all you know about Burning Man is what you read here and what the media has told you, this article works wonders to expand the fuck outta that view… mostly thru linking to some real mind-opening info. Google is so going to ding my blog for how much I’ve been swearing. Oh, well… ISU students get credit for Burning Man: You read that right. The article is even better. One of the funniest things I heard this year was a tweet from the main Burning Man account, hilarious completely due to its juxtaposition. Normally, you hear students grumbling about how they’re trying to get out of class to go to Burning Man. The tweet was a retweet from a teacher who was trying to figure out how to get out of class and away from their students to go to Burning Man. Awesome! The Enduring Appeal of Burning Man: While it’s from 2009, this four-way radio interview is not only entertaining, but downright informative. I love the host, the guests and even the peeps who called in. I don’t really tune in to radio anymore offline, but transcripts like this make for one happy Tiki. Now… it’s been a month since the burn. Let’s compare all the awesomeness above to what has happened here in the “default world” just in the past month. I’ll cover the negatives first, if only so I can end this on a positive note. A month of yuck in the default world: - Obama’s made torture legal. Joy. [link] - The day the ruling was made, almost a hundred cases that were in court from those who were innocents, yet tortured at GITMO, were dropped. Their voice was stolen. - Boulder was on fire, a California neighborhood literally exploded and even Utah wanted in on the bonfire action. - Fucking Mary Anne Hobbs, the goddamned Voice of Dubstep, has left BBC Radio 1. Not Happy! - Facebook made professional AND personal pages smaller and eliminated boxes to make space for larger ads. - Cops stole a new born baby right out of a hospital and actually listed that one of the reasons was that he was affiliated with the Oath Keepers, a peaceful organization that stands up for the constitution. [link]. - The U.S. is taking measures to begin “wire tapping” everything, including emails and other online and offline activities [link]. - Finally… and I thought I’d never live to see it… the U.S. is burning books [link]… and extremists, not wanting to miss out on the action, went and burned the Quran. A month of rock in the default work: - If the Voice of Dubstep is going to step down, at least the Shadow of Dubstep was there with her—Burial. Many in the industry refer to our time as “The Post-Burial Dubstep Environment”. To have Burial and Kode9 with Mary Anne on the last day was awesome. Also, so many of us in the community were tuned in at the same time. We were tweeting back and forth, sending love and it was easily the most unified moment I remember in this entire life outside of Burning Man. I love Mary Anne Hobbs. Without the Voice, the environment may quickly be divided into VIP—the “pop” of dubstep—and independent. It is up to all of us to carry the torch forward and keep this community non-zero. - The movie “Machete” was as absurd and fun as I thought it’d be. Hell yeah! - Science finally verified yet another theory by Arthur C Clark (“2001”), as they discovered a diamond the size of a star [link]. - Solar cells can now be grown like plants and regenerate damages [link - with thanks to Jill]. - MySpace made the first positive changes that I’ve ever seen. Seriously. Check it!. Google also stepped it up, following their voice calling from the month before with a priority inbox that actually works. - I’ve been a fan of Khameleon808 for five years. I’ve been a fan of The Glitch Mob for three years. To see these forces brought together was personally fulfilling on a deep level. Here below is Khameleon’s finished product—The Apple Tree [skip to 1:20 to jump right into the action]:

…I second that shit: “FUCK YOUR WAR!”

Lobster Dragon, Burning Man 2010 Dragon Art Car, Burning Man 2010 Foto by Michael Holden

Tagged: Burning Man

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